Beyond Doubt: Master Decision Making and Chase Your Dreams

Rob Brown Snippet (00:05):

One of the other phrases that I like to think about when I think about what keeps people from making decisions is that a lot of people live in the world of Ready, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim fire, because their plans aren’t solid, they don’t have that picture of where they want to go. But when you have that picture of where to go, that Ready, aim, fire turns into ready fire aim,

Phil Calandra Snippet (00:36):

we’re always looking for the ideal conditions to exist. That’s what we do. That’s our human nature is to avoid things. Because we’ve been convinced that we’re going to be much better off if we go the convenient, easy route in any area of our life.

Rob Brown Intro (01:00):

Welcome to The Truest Fan Blueprint, a podcast for financial advisors, and other professionals looking to get the most out of yourself and your business. I’m Rob Brown, and my partner, Phil Calandra. 

And I promise to walk you through a journey that will allow you to take action in your business and your life, so that you can be the best that you can possibly be. 

Thanks for listening. Yes, you have it right. It is absolutely time for the next edition of the truest fan blueprint. Hey, Phil. Glad to be with you today.

Phil Calandra (01:46):

Always Rob. Let’s do it. Okay, yeah,

Rob Brown (01:49):

for sure. So as Phil and I were getting ready for this episode, we’re talking about the idea of why sometimes it is so difficult to actually make that final decision. And as we were talking about that, something popped into my mind, my wife and I have this new favorite restaurant, we’ve been going to at any time, we were looking for a good date night place to go, we’ve been going there for the last I don’t know, six or 12 months. 

But until six or 12 months ago, we kept hearing about this place, and people kept saying the food was good, but the lines might be long. And it was in a part of town even though our town isn’t that big. 

That was a little harder to get to. And they said it was a little expensive. And so we said no, we can’t do that we can’t do that we have all these reasons for not doing it. Even though everybody said it was something that we should do. 

And we were looking for a new place to eat. And it serves the kind of food that we both enjoy eating and then finally went. And we like, wow, this is awesome. And we keep going back. And as we go back each time we keep saying to ourselves, why did we take so long to get there might sound like a silly example. 

But but it happens a lot in life and in business. And that’s what we want to talk about today is making that final decision to do something that you know you want to do. Because it ties back to your goals or ties back to your dream. It’s part of your truest fan action plan, but you just don’t quite get it done. Why do you think that happens, Phil?

Phil Calandra (03:30):

Yeah, well, this is a great topic for those trying to pursue success. And it’s very simple to me. We’re always looking for the ideal conditions to exist, right in your analogy with the restaurant. It wasn’t convenient, because you never been there. It wasn’t easy, because it wasn’t something you knew. 

And that’s what we do. That’s our human nature is to avoid things. Because we’ve been convinced that we’re going to be much better off if we go the convenient, easy route in any area of our life. 

And that’s like waiting for the storm to pass before you decide to go out and take your action and ideal conditions don’t ever exist. That’s the myth. That’s the lie that we’re told. And that’s what freezes people into not reaching the goals that they set out to not reaching the dreams they set out for.

Rob Brown (04:31):

Yeah, yeah, I guess I guess it’s kind of like getting on an airplane. And it’s it’s stormy out and you’re wondering, you know, is this plane going to even take off but the pilot and the other people who are involved in that decision know, when the right time to take off is even when the conditions aren’t ideal and sometimes had to pull back so maybe that’s not the perfect analogy, but there’s they’re always you reminded me of that, Phil, when you talked about storms, there are just going to be storms in life and in business that kind of get in the way. Rarely are conditions. absolutely ideal.

Phil Calandra (05:12):

Yeah, you’ve got to break away from that thinking, or that mindset that the conditions are going to line themselves up perfectly for you, because I’m telling you, they don’t ever align themselves perfectly. If they did, then everybody would be wildly successful in whatever their pursuit is financially in relationships, and it costs you everything. 

If you do not make that distinction, and that mindset that you have to be able to be willing to start all success comes from acting, all failure comes from reacting. And that’s again, part of our human nature, and you want to become the person that smiles when it gets a little bit tougher, you want to be the person that knows when things get tough, that it’s the signal for you to go a little harder to go one more time with it. 

Instead of waiting for this myth of, you know, I’ll just wait till the ideal conditions are in front of me.

Rob Brown (06:15):

Yeah, yeah. And as we were kind of getting ready for this conversation today was that one of those terms that we talked about filled common term that almost all of us are familiar with, it’s called paralysis by analysis. 

And I think, right, that is something to really be thinking about when you’re thinking about why aren’t you making those decisions? What is causing that paralysis was causing you to think that conditions aren’t ideal, and therefore, you need to spend more time working on it to get ready to do it. 

And it causes procrastination among people who would not consider themselves to be procrastinators, that analysis that thinking that over over analysis,

Phil Calandra (07:05):

yeah, and I think in my own journey, and my own success path, and, and I have a lot more to achieve, and a lot more than I want to do. I’ve said this before, I think it’s a one syllable word called fear. We have in our DNA, it’s in our acculturated nature, to be fearful. And that prevents people from taking the first step. 

It even probably creates people from having the big dreams, we talk about the truest fan action plan. And one of the cornerstones in that which I simply love, is what we call dream big. People just have a natural tendency to not gravitate or want to get out of their comfort zone and go towards that big dream. 

You know, as we sit here today, making this recording, you’re probably going to be listening to it after September the 11th when it actually comes out. But today is September the 11th. I was on an airplane, flying to Tallahassee, Florida at 8:45am. And we know the world changed September the 11th 2001 22 years ago. 

And that was the beginning point of my career and my life’s trajectory changing. Because I did not want to be working in a corporate environment. I decided that day that I was going to take the action necessary to become an entrepreneur, and I started my financial planning practice. was I afraid? 

Yeah, I was scared to death. The storm, we didn’t know what the world was changing into 22 years ago, today. But if I’d waited for the storm to pass, if I waited for ideal conditions, to prepare myself to be in business, and to become a solo financial planner, I would not be sitting here today with the success and fulfillment I’ve had.

Rob Brown (09:05):

Yeah, that’s a great example, Phil, and thanks for sharing that because that has to strike home. Because it’s it is very difficult not to remember. Remember that day and where, where we all were on that day. 

And for you it it actually created a picture of where you want it to go in the future. Because, you know, in our process, our coaching process, we start with dreams and, and dreaming big. And there are two things I think that happen when people don’t act on their dreams. 

First and foremost, a lot of people don’t take the time to actually create those big dreams. So it’s hard to have that Guiding Light that keeps you from becoming paralyzed that keeps you from wanting to do what you want to do. 

If you don’t have the guide Picture that that mental picture of success and of your future and the people that you’ll be around and the things that you’ll be doing the things that you’ll be able to, to say about your life, you have to dream first to be able to have the dreams to guide you. 

And then the second thing, the second condition, I think that happens with dreams is they get pushed aside, we don’t take enough time when we do have dreams that we really are serious about to to review them and reread them and talk about them with our mentors and people that we care about, so that they are part of our ongoing planning. 

So that’s why you’re even in a practical sense in the work that we do in our coaching, when we’re setting up a 90 day sprint using the tourists fan Action Plan, the very first thing we do is we go back and read the dreams. 

And then we and then we look at what we were able to do in our last sprint, whether we had lots of success or some success myths mixed in with some challenges. And we say well, how did that match up against those things that we were really looking out towards, which then makes planning those top action items that we want to work on in the coming sprint, the right ones because they they flow down from those from those dreams that we have, and they help eliminate that procrastination, we feel much more certain about our path forward.

Phil Calandra (11:28):

Yeah. And that’s why it’s called action planning. It’s the journey of 1000 miles begins with the first step. We all know this, it’s just not in our human nature, to want to look down the barrel of the 1000 miles and that taking the first step, it’s just not in our nature. But you can do it and we’re encouraging you to do.

Rob Brown (11:50):

Yeah, so one of the other phrases that I like to think about when I think about what keeps people from making decisions is that a lot of people live in the world of Ready, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim fire. And because their plans aren’t solid, they don’t have that picture of where they want to go.

But when you had that picture of where to go, that Ready, aim, fire turns into ready fire aim, because you’re you are ready to go. You have confidence about that next, move forward. And I think that is extraordinarily important. And again, just take taking it back to the work that we do as we guide and coach and mentor others is. 

I can’t tell you how many times I work with somebody for a couple of weeks. And they say, Man, Rob, this is awesome. You just eliminated like 10 things that I didn’t know how to get rid of. And now I can see that clear picture forward. Why didn’t I start this months or even years ago, I’ve wanted a coach, I wanted a mentor. 

But I knew I needed one. I’ve got a golf coach who helps my golf with my swing. But I’ve kept putting this off. And this is, you know, so much more important. And that’s what we want to get the folks listening to this podcast to really be thinking about as you’re taking action. 

Here, Phil, we want you to be thinking about what are those things that you know that you need to do that are based on your plans and your dreams? And just getting out there? And doing and taking, taking action? Anything to add to that?

Phil Calandra (13:39):

Nope, stop waiting for the storm to pass. And just do it as the old Nike saying slogan is yeah,

Rob Brown (13:46):

that’s another that’s another good actually, I think when we talk about this topic, there are a lot of great phrases, which probably points to the fact that this is a persistent problem for a lot of us in all aspects of life. 

So as we land the plane on this episode, we really want to encourage you if you have those dreams, and those things that you’re really working towards that are important, do they fit into your plans, take action, just do them start working on them. 

The worst that can happen is you find out that you’re a little bit out of step and you can course correct. But you’ll never know if you’re on the right course or the wrong course, if you don’t take the first step. That’s right. And with that, we will call it an episode. 

Thank you all so much for listening in. I’d love it if you would take some time to give us a five star rating on this podcast and also to share it with others just use that share button in your favorite podcast player and share it with your friends so that we get more and more folks to join us in The Truest Fan Community. And as always, we’re rooting for your success. Take care. 

Thanks for joining us for this episode. The Truest Fan Blueprints If you want to learn more, head over to our website truestfan.com. On the site, you’ll learn more about becoming a truest fan. You’ll also find today’s show notes and links to the other gifts and resources we talked about